_joy_

The weekend of May 20th was supposed to be life reinvigorating, met a lot of people got great ideas and rediscovered my most cherished friendship(_thats_for_you_*). And then promptly early Sunday morning, we faced a car at standstill 10 m ahead, ourselves on 40 mph.

Next 3 seconds were pure bliss.

No thought in mind(tb.fu - to be . followed up), just consciousness rolling in action, 3 sensations:

1. brake and judge
2. whats on left
3. turn left

And then the bliss was over, just drained. So many thoughts, checks, presumptions, rationality.

Friendship that I fought for was in threat. I heard *, and all your words, feelings were completely justified. At the back of my mind I realized that there is no love, just one love, no um', _one_joy_. And I felt that for all dear, *, butki, ..

there's just this one life I know of, and now it needs my burning my oil to light my way every day.

When we sat there in the parking besides the road, to check on things, I suspect my spine was very straight, wonder if it was like Suki in her kimono.

presence, consciousness, right decisions, focus, fearlessness, sharpness, clearheadedness, action, connectedness to action, speed, all were required for this state of bliss, for us to survive, to feel the bliss. It could so easily have ended up all wrong, but I touched joy.